As parents, we often try to shield our children from the harsh realities of life in an effort to protect their innocence and maintain their sense of security. However, there are some secrets that parents keep from their kids that are not just harmless omissions but rather deep, dark, and potentially damaging secrets. These are the secrets that can haunt a child well into adulthood and affect their relationships, mental health, and overall well-being. It’s time to shine a light on the uncomfortable truths that parents have been keeping hidden for far too long.
1. Valentine’s Flowers
“My dad cheated on my mother while she was going through cancer treatments. My mother asked for a divorce; he said to go and take the kids. Every Valentine’s Day, I would receive flowers from my dad and get so happy. My mom would smile and nod and get excited with me. I would call him and thank him. He never sent me flowers. It was my mom all the years. Same thing with birthday cards and Christmas gifts from him. They were never from him; my mom just put his name on them in similar handwriting. Went as far as writing return addresses on mail too. My mom was a superhero of a single parent,” one person shared.
2. Money Can’t Buy Happiness, But It Can Buy Custody
Another person recalled a situation surrounding their parent’s messy divorce. “It was a secret until recently, my mom told me. When she and my dad got divorced, things were very, very messy, and my dad would do shitty things to dodge paying for my care. He ended up owing my mom a couple of thousand dollars, and my mom was ready to sue. But instead of getting the lawyers involved, and because she knew my dad was not a healthy person to be in my life, she offered him a deal- keep the money, but relinquish custody officially. I’d still get to see him if and when I wanted, but he would give up all legal rights as a guardian. Because he hated paying my mom THAT MUCH, he took 2k over me. Not a life-changing, earth-shattering secret; it’s just revealing to know my dad values money more than me.
Before anybody casts judgment on my mom, my dad was (and probably is) a piece of human garbage who abused me and allowed me to be abused a few years after this, so I’m 1000% fine with my mom’s decision. She’s my favorite person in the world, and every single day I am so lucky to have her in my life.”
3. A Paternal Mix-Up
Another person shared a story of how they found out their dad wasn’t their dad.
“I was the kid in the scenario.
When I was like 12, my dad died of leukemia. He was never around much, so I didn’t see him often, but that was never the secret. I actually remember the day he took off and left us; woke up one morning, and there was a pile of new toys on the living room floor with a note for mom.
Anyway, he started coming around when he received the prognosis. We developed something resembling a positive relationship before he died. When he passed, it absolutely destroyed me. I still remember the funeral. I had to be dragged, kicking and screaming, out of the car because I didn’t want to see it. In his will, he left me his car – a Camaro, that I was supposed to get when I turned 16. His parents fought tooth and nail to keep it from me (they were really shitty people, his entire side of the family was), and we eventually just told them to fuck off and keep the damn thing.
Fast-forward about 15 years. I found out the guy that died was not actually my dad – he was my brothers’ dad. My real, biological dad has been living in the next town over, twenty minutes from my house, my entire life. My entire family knew about it, except for me. It was why my “grandparents” fought to keep the car – they knew I was not his son (I still don’t know if HE knew or not, but I assume so).
My maternal grandmother has met him several times in my life. My mom said she never thought it was anything worth digging up. Said she intended for me never to find out.
I’ve still never spoken to him. I know a name and an approximation of where he lives (as of about ten years ago). Beyond that, I know jack about the guy. Grandma said if I ever wanted to meet him, she would help me contact him. Dunno if I ever will.”
4. Hidden Mother
Someone else recalled the story of finding out that their mother was not dead, just forbidden to see them. “I’m the child (48 f), but my father told me my mother was dead all throughout my childhood, and everyone in the family – aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, stepmother – supported the lie. Not because my mother was on drugs or abusive, or a criminal, or even a bad person. Just because they had a huge argument one night and she went to stay with a friend, without me, so he decided she would never be allowed to be in my life again. Ever. He wrote her off. On my 18th birthday, she called our house and asked to speak with me. So, I found out the truth.”
5. A Christmas Eve Surprise
“Not a parent but a child. This last Christmas, I found out that not only was my mom already previously married and divorced, but my dad had a kid before he married my mom. So I have a half-brother or sister that I have never met. The real kicker was I found it out from my new sister-in-law who had someone do some digging, found out, assumed that I must already know and brought it up out of the blue on Christmas Eve while we were baking cookies,” one person recalled.
6. Dosed With Sleeping Pills
Another individual shared that their mom used to dose them with sleeping pills when they were younger so she could sneak out to see her affair partner. “I‘m the child but my dad waited till I‘m grown up to tell me that my mom gave me a lot of sleeping pills when I was a little child, so she could leave me alone at home to maintain her relationship with her lover while my dad was working in another country.. that cleared up many things.”
7. Secret Lottery Winners
One person shared that they won the lottery and decided to keep it a secret from everyone, including their own kids. “We hit the lottery for 12.5 million dollars, and nobody in our family – including our children has any idea. Besides the government and us, the only other people who know are an attorney we hired to keep our identities private, as well as an accountant. We have kept our lives pretty normal… We both work, so there looks like there’s an income coming in… we both enjoy what we do and didn’t want to have anything change drastically. We just didn’t want to ruin our relationships with everyone or spoil our kids… We have it safely invested for their futures… But not until they establish themselves on their own without any idea that there is a safety net. We support numerous charities. It’s a blessing to win but a bigger blessing not to be destroyed by money. Obviously, this isn’t my real name which would defeat the whole purpose.”
8. Different Wives in Different Countries
One guy explained that his brother told him that his dad had another wife in another country. “My dad has a second wife in a different country. I got the news from my sibling who lives there, but little did my father know that my brother had told me. My mom doesn’t know about my father’s second wife. Not sure how this will play out in the future. I hope it really doesn’t. The screen writer just forgot to finish this part of my film.”
9. Twins Who Aren’t Twins
“Pretty sure they know, but my second cousins are technically twins two years apart. Their parents did in vitro, and 2 of the eggs were fertilized. They weren’t ready for twins, so they froze one of the eggs and had their second kid two years later. It’s actually pretty cool,” one person shared.
10. The Initially Unwanted Miracle
“My 3-year-old is an absolute miracle. Her birth mom (my wife’s sister) didn’t want her, and basically tried for an intentional miscarriage via massive drinking and drug use. Born 11 weeks premature, and with 5 different drugs in her system, she shouldn’t even be alive by most medical estimations, yet here she is. Slight developmental setbacks, but she is solidly inside the bell curve. Her socialization is on point, and she should start school on time. She will know none of this until she is in her teens, most likely. I am so grateful for this impossible little person,” one guy shared fondly.
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